My Life is Fight

I will fight you.

Whether in the myriad of forums of Something Awful
Or the anonymous halls of 4chan
Or even the formal, antiseptic confines of Facebook
I will fight you.

I will follow you to multiple message boards
On WordPress or Blogger or LiveJournal
I will track you down to the ends of the internet
I will fight you.

You may think you have found refuge on Twitter
Sending your missives in 140 characters to
Anonymous friends who have the unfortunate temerity
Of lending your ear.

But I shall strike you down
With my brilliant logic and wit and evidence
And at the end of the day your arguments will lie
Naked, untrue, unproven, and wrong, wrong, wrong.

For I am the internet kung fu master.
All who defy me shall feel the full measure of wrath.
You shall regret the day the thought crossed your mind
That you could ever win a fight with me.

My rage is pure.
My righteousness is holy.
My cause is just.
My fire, it burns.


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