A Poem About Fanfics

Let me me curl up to a good fanfiction
Satisfy the unrequited sexual tension.
From Jack and Liz on 30 Rock
To Shenny and Jannie and Kirk and Spock
And shipper couples too many to mention.

Please write me a good fanfiction
Take me on their unwritten adventures.
Is Oz a secret god?
What of Clark Kent’s secret flaws?
Could Lost’s John Locke be struggling with dementia?

Type away at speculative fan fiction
Don’t take this as a mockery; I’m sincere.
Is it on fanfiction dot net?
Or a short tumbler post, I’ll bet?
With no irony I’ll read it. Have no fear.

Why the scary stigma of fanfiction?
In a world where Wicked’s a big Broadway revue?
Best sellers are Fifty Shades.
And what conclusions can be made
Of the entirety of Star Wars Expanded U?

All things unauthorized are fanfiction.
Some unwritten but in your deep imagination.
We all love to speculate
On which plot will percolate
In the twists of your head canon adaptation.

So go ahead and write me that fanfiction.
Tell me stories of romance and of fighting.
Spin a tale of D’Arcy’s longing
Or Middle-Earth’s new age dawning,
Because it beats a world where no one’s writing.


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