Thoughts about Spam

Worst Halloween costume ever.

I have to get some things off my chest regarding an important topic that affects us all: spam. Not the e-mail. The actual meat product produced by Hormel. And remember, these are my opinions, not a statement of fact … but I feel that if you dig deep enough in your heart, you too will find them too true.

My observations on Spam:

  1. Spam makes a terrible Halloween costume.
  2. Hormel’s Spam website is way too white bread.

Did you check out that website? I mean, the whole theme seems to revolve around a WASPy Midwest nieghborhood straight from a 1960’s sitcom. It’s cute, and it’s a nice bid to try to make Spam “trendy” … but it doesn’t do anything to erase the stigma of Spam as this gross slimy food that may or may not be made out of pork brains. So while it may sell some ironic hipster Spam shirts, it’s not going to make people want to stick that stuff in their mouths.

If Hormel really wanted people to eat Spam, they should look toward the areas that actually appreciate it… namely the Pacific Islands and Asia. Look at Hawaii. They love Spam. Burger King and McDonald’s serve spamburgers there. They eat Spam musubi, which is sort of like a Spam sushi … only the Spam is deep fried and not raw. Heck, I’ve had a musubi and I love it. (It’s pretty much the only food I’ll make of Spam these days. Just make some rice and wrap everything up in seaweed and you’re ready to go!)

That’s much more appetizing than the website featuring a cheery guy flipping Spam at his grill. (BLECKKKK!) C’mon, Hormel! Highlight the ethnic delicacies you can make from Spam! Who knows… maybe some day in the future, people will think of Spam as a gourmet food.

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