Have you ever found yourself reading a Roger Ebert review, and found yourself thinking: “Hey, if only this guy could draw, this would make a kick-ass webcomic?” No? Then you, my friend, are a smart, well-adjusted citizen. For the rest of us who must satisfy our sick, sick craving, there is today’s subject, the little known webcomic known as Joe Loves Crappy Movies.
This webcomic doesn’t have a wikipedia entry, so short of venturing the online message boards, I’m going to have to play this by ear. “Joe Loves Crappy Movies” is a semi-autobiographical webcomic by Joe Dunn. According to the entry on his website, Joe is a graduate of the Parsons School of Design in New York City. (Which, incidentally, is where the webcomic is based.) In his comic, he gives himself a totally unflattering appearance, which I have no doubt is what Joe looks like in real life. I mean, who would deliberately make themselves look like a toad in their own comic strip? Other than For Better Or Worse‘s Lynn Johnston, that is. He also gives cartoon Joe a permanent smirk on his face, which isn’t as endearing as real-life Joe probably thinks it is.
Nearly every webcomic follows a different movie for the day’s theme. Some strips show Joe and a friend going to a movie and making snarky comments like you or I would do (Ultraviolet). Some are parodies of scenes within the movie (King Kong). And some are gag strips with only a tenuous connection to the movie (Herbie: Fully Loaded).
I remember reading all over the web about Transformers shortages, and that no new shipments would arrive until October. Wal-Mart and Target are all out of Transformers, except for the ones that turn into MP3 players and video game controllers. Y’know, the ones no one wants.
Then it surfaced at the somethingawful.com forums that a few members were having luck at Kohl’s. I thought of going there myself until I remembered another store: Toys R Us. Yeah, I forgot that this store existed too. I decided to drop by, and voila:
It’s hard to make out from my cell-phone pic, but those are rows and rows of Optimus Prime and Megatron toys. And they weren’t the only ones. I decided to pick up the following: Optimus Prime, Jazz, and Devasta… er, Brawl.
So does this mean that stores are restocking the Transformer movie toys? Or have we forgotten that retailers like Toys R Us actually sell toys?
What do you, the viewers at home, think?
EDIT: I just got through transforming Jazz and I noticed his Autobot logo is on his crotch. Jazz, you sick bastard. Ha-ha! I am lovin’ this toy. He’s got much sturdier legs than that dork, Barricade.
My girlfriend and I caught Bourne Ultimatum this week-end. I was genuinely surprised that the theater was packed: it was three weeks after the release date, and Bourne was still drawing in the viewers.
At about the ten minute mark, my girlfriend whispered in my ear and said, “The camera’s shaking too much.” I don’t buy Ebert’s lame excuse at suntimes.com that shaky-cam had become so prevalent in movies that he was tired of complaining about it. That might be true, but Bourne Ultimatum must’ve been the first movie I’ve scene that was TOTALLY shot in shaky-cam.
I’m not going to complain to much. Granted, I HATED the shaky camera, but I can understand why it was done. Jim Emerson’s Scanners has the best explanation. Shaky cam made some of the most ridiculous action sequences, such as leaping window-to-window in Tangiers like a video character, look downright plausible.
However, some other things that irked me:
- After the movie, I told my girlfriend, “OK, so now apparently Bourne is Wolverine.” She thought it meant that Bourne was nigh indestructible. I really meant those flashbacks. Now, Bourne was created before Wolverine, true, but the hazy, disorienting flashback sequences reminded me a lot about how Wolvie’s origin story used to be portrayed in the comics and in the X-Men moives.
- SPOILERS: For an entry in the Bourne series, that ending was super-sappy. Bourne convinces government-trained agent not to shoot him by appealing to his inner humanity. Guh. Bourne plays dead, but swims away while his lady-friend smiles. Double guh. Lady CIA agent sees the light and turns on the govenment. Nice, but unconvincing.
- I can understand Bourne calling evil CIA guy from his own office, since Bourne is so indestructible that the could’ve walked out of the office with an Abrams tank pointing down his face. Yet it seemed out of character to call him up until he was out of harm’s way.